I started to send this to my friend who posted this article
originally in a PM because I know I will be fussed at by all the women who
don't do this stuff but the reality is that I think you can be independent and
still observe old fashioned niceties. For those of you who don’t know me well,
I’m just a little strong minded. I didn’t marry until I was 35 and when I did,
I didn’t change my name. All of our bank accounts and credit cards are separate
but we share the bills. So, regarding the article of 8 things women should do
that they don’t anymore:
This is the article:
http://www.examiner.com/list/8-things-women-just-don-t-do-anymore
COOK: It's really about the only thing I do very well and I
enjoy it. There are recipes out there that everyone can manage, even culinarily
challenged individuals.
CLEAN: Wish I didn’t have to but I can't stand a nasty house. I
take care of the inside and he does the outside although we both help each
other with chores when we can or the need arises, such as entertaining guests
on short notice. If you live in filth then you are filthy. No excuses, no
whining, there it is.
FIX HIS PLATE: To me
'plating' is part of cooking. My meals need to look nice as well as taste good.
I fix his plate in the evening and even carry it downstairs to the man cave if
he's not standing right there. Also, I fix his lunch box and put it by the door
every day AND set his breakfast out even though I leave the house to workout
before he even gets out of bed. I also get up and make his breakfast and lunch
on days when he has to work and I don't.
(The ladies are starting to really get ticked at me right now.) Bonus,
he doesn’t trash my kitchen.
WATCH YOUR MOUTH: I cuss too much. Not as bad as some and I’m
trying to working on it. When I was 14 my best friend’s big brother, whom I had a
crush on, told me not to cuss. He said guys don’t like to hear that come out of
a girl’s mouth. I’ve never forgotten that. (BTW, I ended up marrying that same
guy many, many, many years later.)
GIVE HIM COMPLIMENTS: I say nice things to him. Don’t you
like being told you look nice or that the stew was really good? Of course, you
do. There is nothing wrong with telling
anyone when they look good or have done something well. “The yard looks good.” “I
like that color on you.” Or “That’s a good idea.” Goes a long way with anyone including
your partner.
TAKE CARE OF YOUR APPEARANCE: You don’t have to do hair and
make up to run to the store but you can at least get dressed and wear something
not totally ragged out. This one isn’t just about him, it’s about you
respecting yourself and not being lazy.
DRESS FOR DATES: Again, not that hard. Be glad he wants to
take you out and dress accordingly. You have all those cute clothes in the
closet, wear them. You show respect for both of you when you put effort into
your appearance. (No, appearance isn’t everything but it doesn’t hurt to try.)
Remember how you paid attention to yourself and the way you looked before you
got married? Why did you stop? He’s the same person; in fact, you have even
more invested in him now.
ANTICIPATE HIS NEEDS: OK, this one is definitely a stretch
for some modern women. Does this really
mean kowtowing and schlepping to his every need? I don’t see it that way. I
think this is a matter of being courteous. How hard is it really, upon hearing
his car pull up, to meet him at the door and take his lunch box. He just worked
twelve hours and was on his feet the whole time. It is only thoughtfulness
which drives this behavior. Wouldn’t you love it if he brought you cup of
coffee in bed one weekend morning? What if he refilled your wine glass before
you got up to do it?
No, I don’t think all these activities things are archaic. Should women do them? I can't answer that for everyone. The
definitions and expectations for women have changed over the years but
everything listed in the article is derived from consideration, kindness, and thoughtfulness.
Everything listed demonstrates that you respect yourself and your loved ones.
The last five should be totally reciprocal. That means you both do these things for each
other. (Yeah, I wish he’d dress up a little more for our dates.) Consideration and good manners are something
we should exhibit to everyone we encounter, even total strangers. In a close
relationship courtesy, whatever its modern form, is imperative.
